To share in another’s grief is no easy feat.
The scaler waves of one in grief measures differently day by day, sometimes hour by hour.
Of course, the meals, the cards, the “I’m here if you need anythings” are helpful. Appreciated, yes, very much so.
Grief though is a funny thing, it hits different for every loss. It is specifically tied to what it is you have lost. The what or the who that has become a part of your identity, when stripped away it’s as though a part of you has also died. That’s the jarring, unexpected part, the weasel that keeps popping up uninvited.
Here it is and this is important. Feel all the feels, lean into it even. You want to cry? Well then, cry. You need to talk? Well then, call one of those “I’m here when you need me’s”. Grief is not something to be hidden or shied away from. Grief is the other end of love, safety, security and so much more. A mixed bag to be sure. So, grieve. Let it run it’s course so you can get to the other side of this pain.
What does the other side of this pain look like?
It’s softer, a little lighter. Soulful. Deeper reflections and insights. There are some things that you couldn’t see before. Things that were just things are now beautiful in a simple sort of way.
Is it worth it? Is it worth the pain? Sometimes. Most times, yes. What is always worth it though is the you on the other side of grief. The you that has grown from intense discomfort. The you that is somehow more of you than ever before.
You, beautiful you are capable of hard things.
You, beautiful you will laugh again.
You, beautiful you will be alright in due time.
You will.
Channeled message from Armory Wilson. Armory came in with… ‘Smoke? You smell smoke?’ He lived in Indiana in 1932… ‘Hay fire, barn fire. We lost animals. Animals we loved and cared for. It was winter so they were all in the barn. Such a horrible, tragic, so tragic accident. The oil burner. It was so cold. The water was frozen. Everything was frozen. I needed water for my animals, heat.’